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Friday, June 17, 2016

National Beer Mile - Las Vegas

You know, at some point there has to be something out there to get me motivated and do one of the 3 million "runs" that come through the town.
Being a general fat-ass, with asthma, I've always been against doing them because.... well, because i pretty much can't physically run without my body trying to kill me by stopping the breathing function that it has.

So when the National Beer Mile came across my book of face I thought it was perfect.
I signed the wife and I up for the event (when they were running a 20% off promo because I'm a cheapass).

We can totally walk a mile, drink 4 beers and enjoy an open bar after party.

I do believe Stump will also be participating in this event but I'm sure with his whole super healthy super fit new being he'll be one of those rat bastards who actually runs the mile.... so boring.

I've already got the day requested off of work and I'm super stoked.
The best part is, this is the same day as my parents anniversary - so I'll get drunk by 5pm and then enjoy a nice dinner!!

Now, my only issue is sneaking 4 beers into my gym so that I can practice this event on the treadmill and/or elliptical.

Thursday, June 16, 2016

Confessions of....

Here I sit, broken hearted
Came to shit but only farted.

I have been intending to blog more often, I really have.
However, family life....

I know a lot of you have families and still blog.  My issue really isn't the family but more-so the littlest member of the family,  my nearly 17 month old baby boy, the love of my life.

You (u) see, when I am not working I am at home spending quality time with the family.  I do attempt to pick up one of my hobbies from time to time but he makes things difficult with his constant want of attention and need for me to join it.  Currently he is sitting on my lap and drinking a little bit while trying to slap the keyboard and not allow me to put my words in an order without all those extra letters that he is pressing.

So, while I don't get to game or blog nearly as much (or almost not at all) as I would like I am absolutely in love and wouldn't change it for anything.

I was going through my computer because I wanted to set up a spreadsheet for some other thing I wanted to do when I found a folder labeled simply "Confessions of."

I had to look, obviously I made it - but what was in it.

It was broken into 7 different text documents and when I saw it I knew it was one of those random books that I was working on.  Not because I have any disillusions of becoming famous and selling a million copies and get rich, but just because I like to type and tell stories.  The  goal was to type up a crappy little book, force someone to edit it and then self publish it.  Just because I could really.

(I am going to point out that sitting at the kitchen table with a baby in my lap and typing is hard, but luckily I put his Youtube Songs on the TV and he is mostly distracted - he has only made me delete things 2 or 3 times.)

As I am reading over the things I have written I realize that just 4 short years ago I had a lot of anger
in me and I feel like I am a completely different person now.  Time flies and things change.  It is hard to tell how much they change until you can objectively look back on them.   Looking at the things I was writing (and probably will keep writing now that I found this random folder hidden away on my computer) I am sure that once I am done it will seem as though two completely different people wrote the different "chapters."

Now - to the participation part of the blog.   For those of you who use blogger - You can click on the thing above when doing a post to add an image - (it is right beside LINK).   There is a tab to use photo's from your phone.  Last year I upgraded my phone and now my most recent photo's no longer show up for use.   Does anyone (without me having to go to google to figure this out) know how to get my phone sync'd with the blog again so that I can use recent photo's that are on my phone?   (I do the blogging from a computer or else this would not be an issue).

Eh, it appears as though I now have to pack my lunch and head to work.

Hi Ho
Hi Ho
It's off to work I go
My Name is Rick
Got a Giant Dick
Hi Ho Hi Ho

Friday, May 13, 2016

A family life update

As of last month my wife and I are practically Debt Free.
I say practically because she still has one outstanding bill in collections and the collection agency isn't willing to meet our offer yet.
She owe's $600 from a douche bag ex who wouldn't pay the bill and she has called offering $300 for them to settle.  Their counter was $520 and after escalating it to a Supervisor his counter was $480.
We hung up and will try again every month until they cave.

The other debt I have is my Amazon credit card which I use for some miscellaneous purchases because those purchases give me cash back to use on Amazon thus making a bunch of my extra
spending free.

My wife, being from the school of Ramsey, isn't excited about my continued use of this card (even though I pay it off, in full, every single month) because "no one ever got rich from their credit card points" but she is willing to accept my use of it as long as I am not getting out of hand with it.

So, barring those two minor items we are debt free and are going to live a debt free life style from here on out.

To that point we just recently got back from a little get away to California where we took a short vacation to celebrate our second anniversary.  We paid for this trip entirely in cash from our lodging to our daily trips to the beach, Downtown Disney, Universal City Walk and meals.   It was truly a freeing experience to be able to take a vacation and only spend the money we brought.  Our vacation did not follow us home and we won't have monthly reminders about what we spent while we were on vacation coming from companies wanting more money and charging us horrible interest rates.

Life is good.

We are now currently saving up for anything we want to do and anything we have plans for.  Our current major goal is to get an emergency fund in the bank.  We have a goal of 6 months worth of living expenses and then we start saving for a down payment on our house for next year.

And now, the hellion is awake and wants to smack the keyboard and get into stuff, so my time has come to an end....

Tuesday, May 10, 2016

Starting off in a hole

I have a leak in my game where I like to start off well into the negative so I can spend the rest of my session trying to get back to even.

Sometimes these starts are because I have poor luck and some of these are because I play too loose and don't have the skills to cover my ideal play style (I'm not oblivious, good thing I play for fun).

The last time I went out to play I ended up at the Mirage.  Lately I've just kind of been driving around and when a casino happens to strike my fancy that is where I end up playing.  I almost parked at Treasure Island because I noticed a sign at the entrance to their parking garage making a dig towards MGM Properties and advertising FREE PARKING.
On this occasion, less than an hour into my session I was wishing that I would have ended up somewhere else.

I started my session at 7:50 pm and I had the dealer deal me in right away because people who wait for the blinds to pass are fish and practically draw attention to themselves "Hey look at me, I probably read this in a book somewhere that it's negative variance to play right away."  Screw those guys.

My first hand, as a reward, is Ace Queen.  I raise and make cautious bets to the river and win a pot when my pair of queens with top kicker was good.

When the second dealer sits (about 15 minutes after I did) I was up $47 and it was all thanks to the AQ hand.  This is when things go south for me.

Dealer number two must have been contacted by the Poker Godz upon seeing me play before waiting for the blinds as he immediately deals me AA which I raise and win about $7 with and then he deals me aces again (back to back hands).

The 2nd pair of Aces, by the time the action got to me there was already a raise to $11 and I made it $31.  The only person to call is the original guy who raised and we see a flop Queen high.  By the time the hand is over I have put about $150 into the pot and I watch all my chips slide over to him because he flopped a set of 8's against me.

Somewhere around 6 hands later I give him, that same bastard, the last hundred or so that I had let in my sack as we turn a Flush over Flush situation where his cards hold substantially more value than mine do.

I always love re-buying before I even play 30 minutes.

By the time the 3rd dealer sits I am down $272 and it hasn't even been 45 minutes.  I'm pretty pissed at my plan to go to the Mirage and wish I would have done my original intentions which was to park at Bally's and walk over to Planet Hollywood.

Over the course of this Dealers down I slowly gain about 120 of my money back and on his last hand I piss $40 of it away as I turn 2 pair against a guy who flopped top two.  It wasn't a substantial loss because the board was pretty creepy and nobody wanted to invest a lot.

From 9 until about 10:30 I hovered at about negative $200 until I started to hit a few hands.
At this time I am sitting in the 1 seat and there is a guy in the 6 or 7 seat who has been playing fairly aggressively.  If he is in a pot he raises it up, usually a small raise to 7 or 8 and if his hand has more power a larger raise (I didn't discover this until later, but I had a hunch).

I had watched him play post flop and his betting patterns were very consistent.   One hand that I played was a limped pot (rare).  I bet the flop and he called.  On the turn I checked because neither of my draws got stronger and I was still pairless.  He bet $15 and I called.   On the river I checked and he bet $30 - and he did it using a Green chip and a Red chip.   I went away not willing to commit more money to a hand where I wasn't even playing high card.

A few hands later I am in a blind and he raises to $7 and gets two callers back to me so I come along with 63s.   I flop a pair of 6s on a Jack high board and I have back door flush and straight draws.  He bets $10 and I come along.
The turn gives me a chance at a flush to go with my pair, I check and he bets $15 which I call without thinking.
The River doesn't do anything.  I check and he bets $30.   This is the 3rd time I have seen him do $15/30 on the Turn/River and I think about it for a few and mostly am just curious what range of hands he is raising with and then making these bets so I end up calling.
He flips over something like 57 diamonds and I can't see where he connected with the board at all so I flip my hand over calling a pair of 6s and the pot is pushed to me.
Guy gets pissed that I just callecd him down that light and the guy to my left comments that "I guess sometimes you just feel it and go for it huh?"

Two hands later the guy who I just pissed off gets stacked and rebuys for $300.

The next hand I play against him I have 24s and call another $7 pre-flop and hit a pair of 4s.  I bet the flop and he calls.  I turn a 2nd pair and check to him, he bets $15 and I call.  On the River he best $30 and I raise, he calls.   His irritation with me grows.

The next hand I play against him I flop a pair but no one bets the flop.  I turn 2 pair and lead out $15 into him, he calls.  A blank river and I throw out $30 just imitating his bets and he calls.  I can tell he is really getting tired of me.

A few hands later He and I are heads up and I lead out $15 and he just auto mucks his cards sending them across the table.

Slowly but surely climbing my way out of the hole and mostly thanks to one guy who probably thinks I have a horseshoe up my ass.

At 11:30 I've been here longer than I had wanted to but I'm still down $76 at this point and really wanting to get even so that I can book my 3rd winning session in a row.

Half way through the down I look down and see Pocket Kings.  The table has been pretty tight at his point and the guy before me raises to $10.  We are early/mid position and I know if I re-raise it will probably just fold around so I decide to just call.  One other guy in late position comes long.

The flop is Jack high and he leads out $25 into me, I raise it to $70 or so.   Late position folds and the other guy auto calls.
Turn is a blank and he checks it to me so I just slide the rest of my chips out (I have him covered).   He thinks about it a big and calls.
The river is a Queen, I flip my Kings and I never get to see what he had because it was a quick muck after looking at my cards.   My guess is AJ.

At this point I look at my chips and I am up $33 on the evening.  I fold 2 more hands and leave when the blinds hit.

My new Bankroll after this marvelous session is $435.

Friday, April 22, 2016

Story Time

Well, not really - at least not right now.

For those of you who follow me on the Book of Face I made a post a little while ago about how I want to write a story or a series of stories (you can find that post and comment on it here) about a poker player who probably isn't all that good but is willing to do odd jobs to earn buy-ins.

I enjoy writing and at times I can be creative (seldom as they may seem) and I've always really wanted to write a book no matter how much it might actually suck.
I just never go through with it.. .or I never start it or whatever.

So, since I have been reading and listening to a lot of audio books I have been getting that itch again and recently I might have stumbled onto what might have been one of my biggest problems over the years.  I generally have a story idea but I just don't know how to flesh it out because I really have no experience with my idea.  

I read somewhere that you should write what you know and that all stories should have some basis in reality.  So, this is why I chose to base my story loosely around poker.  Or with Poker as at least a small focal point, starting point, something something something words words words.

Either way - I'm going to attempt it and in this day and age of social media my main character is going to be given his own presence on the net.
I haven't decided if I'll post the information here of if I'll start a secondary blog just for the story information.
Either way I am trying to challenge myself, force myself to write more and work on creativity.

Also, I would totally appreciate if you all would make sure to pick apart, insult, tell me why it sucks as stuff gets posted because after getting to know you guys over the years I wouldn't expect anything less.

grrouch out

Sunday, April 17, 2016

A short session at The Orleans

I know that there currently is not anything interesting that I can say about my poker sessions, poker wise.   I've been out of the game for entirely too long and my game is rusty.  I've been talking with a buddy in Pennsylvania about both of us picking a night or two during the month to head out to the casino and text back and forth any information or updates from our sessions.  Kind of like a little challenge to go with someone and see who does better.

So far this has gone as far as agreeing that we should do it, we have yet to actually do a session.

My thought is that the texts back and forth along with random Facebook and Twitter updates along with my notepad (whether on physical paper or on my phone/tablet) will provide me with information to jog my memory so that I can make blog post updates.

I love writing and I miss it, it's just that when I feel like writing I am usually at work or not near the house to do it.  When I have downtime at home I really don't feel like writing.  It's a bit frustrating at times.

So, let's get into my last session which I took notes on.
Hope you like it.

Before I even make it to the casino to play some poker I say fuck this place.

On the bottom floor of the parking garage some douche bag speeds up to pass me because 20 feet in front of me are his two old as fuck hippy douche bag friends walking in the opposite direction.  So in order to stop and pick up these friends we risk an accident and block traffic in both directions for 2 minutes instead of just fucking waiting.

Fuck The Orleans.

On the walk to the casino, after parking, an old Asian broad bugs me asking where the entrance was.  I pointed in the general direction and she bitched that there weren't any close parking spots because, you know, we'd hate to actually have to walk any sort of distance before we went and blew all of our money playing Pai-Gow or Baccarat or whatever the fuck it is that old Asian fucks blow there wad at these days.

Fuck the Orleans.

Thirty seconds later a Mariachi performer walks by me.  What is wrong with this world?  Who performs Mariachi at the Orleans?  I hope he got some good tips but probably not as he looked anxious to get the hell out of there.

The Elevator smells like baby shit.  It doesn't quite hit you until after the doors close and you start moving and I am sure this is on purpose so that you don't change your mind and leave for someplace more upscale.

At this point I am not exactly sure what had drug me to this dog forsaken place and more importantly why the hell did none of the above give me the idea that I needed to leave an go someplace better.

Walking into the Poker Room there is one guy watching movies on his tablet.  I observe another table where three people are wearing headphones and another is constantly holding a napkin over his mouth as if this will allow him to not catch the rampant zombieism that is transferred from one person to another by just simply breathing the same air at The Orleans.  You can almost feel their souls being sucked out of their bodies in order to go find something more fun to do.

Why the fuck did I come here again?

9:25 PM - The, I can only assume, torture begins.

I got seated at a table that has one guy younger than I am, one guy in my age bracket and the douche bag watching movies.  There are only two sets of headphones being utilized at this table but there is one guy who looks like he is waiting o die or for aces, whichever happens to come first.  He also looks like he was big into chewing tobacco as one side of his jaw sits substantially lower than the other.  He is wearing a hat that says Purple Heart and has a Purple Heart pin attached to it.  Maybe his jaw got shot in WW1.

The guy to my right just called for the Ace of Jacks as the next card and used the word, and I mean word as in singular, youknowwatimean?

The young guy is short, not in stature but in stack, keeps his eyes on his phone and is wearing either shades or really dark corrective lenses.  Ace of Jacks is drinking and wearing shades as his future is probably pretty bright.

The Cocktease waitress shows up and I ask what is bottled.  She tells me most anything.  I ask for a Blue Moon and she tells me that they don't serve wheat beers, fucking beer racists.  I get a Sam Adams and pray for a quick double so I can get the hell out of here.  grrouch: 0, stupidity: 1.

Slack Jawed Grampa raises to 17 and gets 3 callers, I figure he probably stacks off if I set.  however I am 97% sure he flops top set with an Axx flop.  I fold as he bets damned near pot.   Next hand he gets to the river by calling down with a pair of 3's in his hand and rivers a set.  Maybe Grampa isn't 100% as tight as I thought.

After being here an orbit Tablet has played one hand.  He was in the big blind and Redneck raises to $11 in late position.  Tablet pushes all i for $111.  No Flop Allowed.

Gradpa flops top set and Redneck pays off every bet as he thought he flopped a straight.  He even looked at his hand post flop and still somehow thought he had a straight.  Da-Fuq?

10:03 - Down $26 after the first dealer.  Won one very minor hand against the young kid and folded a lot of random hands.

It is at this point that someone fucking farted.  I don't know if it was someone sitting at the table or if it was someone who was walking behind me.  What I do know is that it was a horribly obnoxious fart that rivaled the smell in the elevator.  What is wrong with people.  If you feel like your ass is going to explode you need to walk away from the poker room to the casino.  Then you expel your ass gas and come back.  Everyone will be happier because of it.

I've got my blue tooth headset half on/half off.  One ear is listening to Mycroft Holmes and I point this out because my headset just died.  I did bring a pair of regular headphones at the last minute as a Just In Case and I have never done that before.  Was I telling myself subliminally that I was going to need a distraction from this hell hole?

I fold a hand as Tablet bets, I don't trust a guy who pauses his movie to play a hand.

I wish I would have remembered that I don't particularly like Sam Adams and ordered something else.  And with no Blue Moon I just don't know what I want for my next brew.  Maybe they have some fruity brews?

Redneck limped Aces early, did not get a re-raise opportunity.

The cocktease waitress shows up and I ask if they have any Redds Apple Ale and she responds with "We have New Castle and Guiness for Dark Beers."  I am now Oh for Two ordering beers and this chick shows her intelligence.

Instead I order a Mich Ultra as I watch Redneck double a guy who flopped an obvious flush but he just couldn't get away from his Aces.   Redneck leaves and I am sad.  Others are sad as well but I really don't give two shits about their feelings.

I take Rednecks vacated seat.  A new guy sits in my old seat and first hand he gets aces and doubles up against a bad player.
Fuck Poker.
Fuck the Orleans.

10:31 - A new dealer Arrives.
I won two hands during the last down and am now down only $25.  I had an enormous $1 profit during that last half hour.  King of the World yo!
Another way of looking at it, my beers are currently costing me $12.50 each - but that way is more depressing so lets not go there right now.

Grampa raises, gets a few callers and everyone goes away on the flop when he continuation bets.  I guess everyone is set mining the guy they all consider to be a horrible nit.  If Grampa loosened up he could just walk over all of us.

11:01 - New Dealer
Down $50.  I was up to only down $4 after winning the only hand I won and I think the only hand I played.  However a shorty calling my raise pre-flop with J8 off put the kabah on that comeback.
Still hating it.
Still praying just to get to even.

Tablets movie must be over because out of the blue he decided to hold a conversation with the two people near him.  After the conversation is over he leaves the table.  I would love to know what amazing conversation such a guy has after watching an entire movie and not saying a bloody thing the entire time.

There is a random guy walking buy calling himself The Drunken Monkey saying that the table he just left doesn't want him bak.  It appears that his parting prose involved telling someone at the table to perform the role of a vacuum on his testi, much like they just performed the same role on his chips.
The Drunken Monkey.

I just played a hand against Grampa instead of the guy who is currently occupying the seat.  That cost me a few bucks.  When did Grampa leave?  Furthermore why had I not noticed.
I am tired and my attention stopped being paid.  I need to cut out soon before I donate my entire stack and go home depressed, and not just for going to the Fucking Orleans.

11:30 - A new Dealer sits and somehow I count my chips and find I am up $8.  I'm not 100% sure what happened that has me on the positive side.  That isn't a good sign.

11:32 I rack up and quit when the blinds hit.  The hand before I quit I flop a flush and milk a few chips off a guy who finally violently folds when the 4th flush card hits thinking I just trumped him.

Plus 53 bucks.
So my actual poker bankroll stands at $53 bucks and some money I borrowed from living expenses just to get out and play for a bit.


Monday, February 08, 2016

Back to the Gym says the Fattie

I'm sitting here listening to what ultimately is my Favorite Iron Maiden album mostly by virtue of nostalgia as it was the first I ever owned and the one I listed to the most, No Prayer for the Dying.

I just got back from my first trip to the gym this year which will be the first of many.  I'm still not close to the 300 plus pound buffoon that I was a couple of years ago but I am also not close to where I was when I got married less than 2 years ago.  

So, it is once again time to buckle down and work towards being where I want to be.

For the most part, like previously, I'm just going to be doing cardio - 99% on the elliptical.  I don't want to be slim and muscular, I just want to lose weight and keep it off.   I want to be healthier for my family so that I can enjoy watching my kids grow old.  I mean, shit, I'm going to be close to retirement by the time my boy graduates high school for crying out loud.

With that in mind I want to be able to get myself to the point where I can do half a marathon on the elliptical before the year is over with the ultimate goal being the ability to do a marathon on the elliptical in the distant future.   DISTANT, as in I'm not even quantifying how far away it is under current circumstances.
I'm going to use the first couple of weeks to ease myself back into it and as such today I decided that I was only going to go for 30 minutes and I did 2.5 miles give or take.  I'm going to work myself back up to doing 45 minutes to an hour consistently.

From there I'll work on getting my lungs better so that I can endure a couple of longer workouts from time to time.

Since a 5k is just a little over 3 miles I know that I'll be able to easily do this before February is over.

My major goal for Feb is to be able to do a full hour without killing myself.
After that I'll figure out how to work towards doing 10k (or 6.2 miles).

What is everyone else doing this year to get into shape or stay in shape?