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Saturday, March 03, 2012

It feels like Hooker Week

EDIT:  Since posting this last night and working today a few more of the bloggers decided to join in on the Hooker Fun and I thought I'd take the time to point you in their direction as well:
Lightning36 decided to join in the fun with a good old fashioned Hooker Story.
Then From there I followed a comment made by JT88Keys and will be adding him to my blogroll as well.
I received an email that the Chaos Theory blog was updated and noticed it was a hooker story as well and also linked to the Poker Grump doing a hooker story of his own.
I believe that to be 7 different blogs in a matter of a few days!  Suhweet!!
One more that's not technically a Hooker blog - but Lucki Duck said that he will be commando during his trip to Vegas and hopes to bring back a story!  

So it just sort of feels like Hooker week in the blog-o-sphere and I'm going to say we owe all of this to Rob.
Recently (and not so recently too honestly) he has had a post or two about hooker sightings in various casino's and I really must applaud him for the length that he goes to in order to try and get his readers a good story.  It is really inspiring and something I am most likely going to copy in the future so that I can provide good, old fashioned, entertainment for all of my readers.
Robs latest story talks about a particularly nice/chatty one at his favorite casino and there is nothing that I need to expand upon, I just think it's a good read.  Especially the part where he tries to get as close as possible to eaves drop on the conversation for more material.  Bloody Brilliant!!

That brings me to example number two where sevencard2003 talks about how he can't find any hookers where he is at and needs to talk to someone younger than he to get tips on how to spot them.

So, that leaves me and while I do not have any recent stories to tell about Hookers, I really just kinda want to talk about them.

I'm going to start at the worst part of the story and that is me admitting that unless I have been approached, I probably couldn't pick out a hooker from a normal person.  Maybe I just haven't put enough time into studying people and figuring out what is what and maybe it's just because I'm so innocent, but I really can't just talk a walk down a long stretch of a casino and go "There be hookers Thar and thar and thar and oh bloody hell that one is obvious."  I'd probably be wrong 85% of the time and 10% would be lucky guesses.

The first time I was ever approached was before I actually moved to this awesome city that I now call home. I was vacationing with 3 friends and we were staying at the Excalibur.  I had just gotten done with a long session at the MGM Grand poker room and was walking/staggering back to get a much needed nap so I could wake up and start the next day.  Both of my vacationing buddies were already in the room and sleeping and I believe the time to be somewhere between 2 and 5 am.

Walking through the NYNY so that I could take the next bridge to Excalibur I was passed by 2 or 3 ladies of the early morning and one approached me asking me if I wanted to have a good time.  I was a bit shocked at first because I'm not used to complete strangers saying anything to me unless I happen to be wearing something with a Steelers Logo on it (and then it's just the normal stuff sports fans say to people who share the same passion in passing).  I kept walking and she became more persistent.
Hooker: "Hey baby, you down for a good time tonight?"
grouch: "Unfortunately not, headed to my room where my friends are sleeping"
Hooker: "You sure, I'm sure your friends won't mind one bit?"
grouch: "yeah, i'm pretty sure, they are in bed sleeping and probably don't want waken up to get kicked out so I can have a quickie"
Hooker: "well, I can always bring my friends along to entertain them"
grouch: "No thanks, appreciate the offer but not tonight"

And that was the end of the conversation. I continued my walk to get some sleep and they moseyed on looking for someone with a warm room and ample money.   As I was walking back to the room I briefly wondered why I was approached but when I got back to the room and hit up the urinal it was pretty damned obvious.  I look like the type of person that generally doesn't just have vagina thrown at him on a regular basis.  I look like a hillbilly from the mountains who hasn't shaved in multiple months and any attention from the opposite sex is a rarity.  It is with this knowledge that I actually expect to get "hit on" more often over the course of my years living in Vegas.
In the future I am hoping to pick up better stories about being approached though.  Thus far both of my approaches have been pretty much the same thing.  Me saying no because I have a roommate and them saying that my roommate probably won't mind at all.  It makes me wonder how many times guys take a hooker back to their hotel room and gets his rocks off while his buddy sleeps (or tries to sleep) in a bed across the room.  I'm sure it's more often that I'd like to believe.


36 comments:

  1. You really stretched for this one.
    Would you really pay for a hooker?

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    1. No, she would pay me and my amazing penis

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    2. Having had hundreds of interactions with your penis I have lots to say about it. None of it includes amazing. :)

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    3. I'm not at all interested in grrouchie's penis. but Carmel, based on what you posted on my blog about your bra size, I would defiitely be interested in seeing a post from grrouchie about your bosom. Sounds like it would be a really ample post.

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    4. Rob is an amazing guy ... and I enjoy his blog immensely.

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    5. Robs a pretty cool chap from what I've gathered so far.
      His stories are great to read and I'm glad you branched out to check out one of mine as well :)

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  2. When I lived in Erie and later in Akron, I saw them all of the time. And I got pretty good at picking them out. I imagine the ones in Los Vegas are probably better at blending in though. More practice and less of a chance that they'll get kicked out. They do kick them out of casinos, or are they (the casinos) generally okay with it?

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    1. Fboy here

      IMO the casinos are fine with high class whores but not meth whores, this can be used to ur adv - I had some girls bein gold diggers with me and my buddy one time, they wer not whores just irritating, so we told security the solicited us and out they went trollolololol

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    2. Colors - interesting. Again, I'm sure there were hookers in Erie which begs the question why I was never approached because I spent a large chunk of time drunk in bars and looking lonely lol :)

      I think my problem is I always try to see the good in people, so when I'm approached by someone on a cold winter night I just assume they are just looking for something warm in their belly!

      Fboy - I agree with your words - as long as they're not skanky cracked out people disturbing the peace the casino's are not going to try to track down the ones being discrete about their business

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  3. I don't think he know's his asshole from a hole in the ground when.it comes to hookers.
    I doubt the casinos are okay with it.

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  4. Gangs of hookers congregate at the cabs at the side of bills at 5am onwards waiting for drunk guys leaving drais, seriously is like an outdoor skanky kitty ranch looool

    These are the lolkind of sloot, u need to see em to believe!!!!

    Slots (not sloots) near an exit are always slots hookers look for a quick date and exit

    I've had many girls pull up in cars asking for a date while I walk between casinos on the strip alone or with buddies, it seems very popular with more upmarket whores, one time these two had a big ass range and gave us a ride from Luxor after the club to osheas, no pushing for business just a free ride, was surreal!

    These are of the top of my head but there are sooo many more, gl FBOYYYYY

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  5. For 90% of dudes in Vegas, if a hot girl smiles at you and/or approaches you in any way, she's a hooker.

    Find a bar with video blackjack games that's near an exit and sit down alone around 3-4 AM and stick $100 in it; odds of being approached with 15 minutes by a hooker are about the same as whether or not Tony will play VBJ today.

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    Replies
    1. Everyone is so full of good advice on spotting our working class citizens.

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  6. http://tonybigcharles.com/ lmaoooo

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    1. Every time I saw it I thought it was fake -
      I just went.
      Wowzers.

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    2. pay the man his maniee imo

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  7. http://tonybigcharles.com/tbc-bankroll-tracker/ omg loooooooooooooooooooooooool

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  8. Tony's life is sad.

    Grrouchie you used to come home and tell me me that you were trying to reached out to Tony. To be there for him to talk to so he didn't feel so isolated and lonely. You were trying to him the man some guidance. What happened?

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    1. There is a limit to what one person can do. Tony needs someone who lives his lifestyle and plays when he plays so that they can be around a vast majority of the time - mainly to be there at that moment when the VBJ machines are calling him most strongly during a post-poker-tilt-session.
      Truth is Tony likes playing the machines as long as he is winning - He only hates when he loses which is just like with every other activity that he does.
      He knows and understands that it's just a matter of time until he has a huge blow up and drops 2 grand on a machine but he won't stop playing.

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  9. tbc is beyond help, he is a ticking time bomb of self destruction and he is also a very, very unpleasant individual

    FBOY (yes have met him albeit on the felt)

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  10. Are you sure you have trouble recognizing hookers? The last time I was approached by one on the Strip, she went on and on about the freaky Steelers fan she had recently serviced. Just sayin' ...

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    1. She offered half price for anything under 5 minutes.
      When I finished she face me change for my $5 ABS said she felt guilty because she didn't even have to do anything and We had 4 minutes to spare.

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  11. Ill add my most interesting story here as I have no blog. Several years back me and a friend were coming back to the Hard Rock after a long night. I young girl walked up to me with the usual "hey baby" line. I just walked past her but my idiot friend stopped to talk to her. He wasn't interested but just bored. I waited a few feet away in case it was a sting so I could bail him out. Suddenly he started walking fast and told me lets go quickly. He said he had offered to buy her a drink but she declined. He asked her if she wasn't 21 and old enough to drink. She said she wasn't even 18 yet only 16. That was the last time he joked around with a hooker.

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    1. Wow - talk about wrong time to relieve boredom!!

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  12. I almost forgot another favorite hooker story, but it's hearsay so I don't know if it counts. I was playing next to a very young Australian guy who recounted this story. His mother had come to Vegas with him. He was barely 21 so she was probably somewhere in her forties. She was having a drink at the bar in the middle of the Bellagio chatting with a gentelman. He got up to go to the restroom and the lady seated on the other side of him slid over and said to the Aussie's mom, "F&%# off! This is my spot."

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  13. I'm a life long resident yet I have no hooker stories. Really starting to think I'm missing out.

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  14. I was at the bar at Bally's early morning. Over 60 gentleman and under 25 black lady down a little but not too far that I couln't hear them. The guy say's Sorry but this is going to be the worst fuck you have ever had.

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    1. Sounds like my typical pick up line.
      This way if I"m any good then it's a pleasant surprise.

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  15. jeez i got loads of stories of sloots....

    i went to amsterdam coupel years ago and one of my boys slept with 13 hookers in 3 days, funny thing is he was so drunk he only managed to finish with ~3 of them. another of the guys was made to put his weiner thru a paper towel with a hole in the middle (she scared of crabs?) he said was a mood killer loool

    in amsterdam there are specific little alleyways with "niche" sloots - one alley of chix wif dix, one of old women and one with just FREAKS, one was stood wearing a strap on and was knockin on the window at passers by using the strap on llmaooooooooo

    Fboy

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    1. I need to take vacations and hang out with you Fboy!

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  16. I am with you Grouchie.. I can not pick one out in a crowd, even worse I give off that serial killer vibe so they do not approach me.. I am disparing of ever seeing one in Vegas.. everyone else I know has spotted one or two or been approached except me!

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  17. Great post and great comments. Grrouchie, my man, I can't belive I commented on all the other bloggers who grabbed this topic and missed yours. First of all, thanks for getting this project off the ground and giving me the credit for it. Now for sure I can never tell my family about my blog! But my hits are goring thru the roof. I am honored to be at least partially responsible for such a worthwhile effort.

    Next, I want to say that I think casinos and hotels are of two minds about hookers. I have seen hookers actually being thrown out at both NYNY and MGM. These were not skanky looking whores but pretty respectable looking ones. At NYNY a waitress at Nine Fine Irishman once pointed out to some friends of mine--without any provocation whatsoever--exactly where the hookers are thrown out and also where they can usually be found sneaking back in after they are tossed. I probably don't have the details right so I will ask my friends for a better explanation and perhapas add it to a future blog post of my own.

    I think it probably goes in cycles based on whether or not the cops are cracking down at the time. Also, my guess is if some of the girls get too aggressive and the guys complain about being harrassed, they probably kick those gals out.

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    1. I was pleasantly surprised to see that lightning joined in - then when everyone else pitched in to make it a hooker story orgy I smiled big big.

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  18. grrouchie,

    First I am the guy who told Rob about the hooker story (see above) at the NY NY. I will elaborate further in a moment. But for now, I must say that this chain of hooker stories is outstanding. You and Rob are geniuses to provide such excellent amateur entertainment which is now mine to enjoy for the clicking. Thanks, and keep the stories coming gentlemen! I can vicariously sit here in LA and enjoy the nightlife in Vegas. What a trip! If I had more money I’d probably be there right now.

    Next, here is the story details of what Rob was writing about: My wife and I were sitting on the patio at the NY NY Nine Fine Irishmen pub. It was a really bitchen hot summer evening, I think in September one year. For you out of towners, the Nine Fine Irishmen Pub in the NY NY casino is a real thrill. 4 hours drinking hard apple cider and Guinness black draft beer? Yep, we do that often. Anyway, because of my retarded fascination with the subject of Vegas hookers, I asked our waitress that night if she knew anything about the “hooker” subject. Well, yes, and she wanted to tell us what she knew. Imagine sitting on that pub patio and facing the MGM across the street. The waitress motioned to her left and said, "that is the door the NY NY security expels the hookers from". So, a casino door just north of the Nine Fine Irishmen pub patio and out onto the Strip sidewalk. I said, "have you seen this happen?" Waitress, "oh, just about every night!" I said, "so what happens next?" Waitress, “well the girls wait until the door closes, then they leap over the low wall here, into our restaurant patio area, then dash back into the NY NY casino!"

    I told my wife that I live a truly sheltered life, but I sure do like the stories!

    Cheers to all, and keep the hooker stories coming!!

    Oh, also grrouchie, get Rob to blog a bunch of detail on the various cocktail waitress outfits in Vegas. NOBODY has that subject more detailed than does Rob. Rob tells me about the outfits verbally, but the WHOLE WORLD would be thrilled to learn what Rob knows about the “tutus” these Vegas casino girls wear. That Rob blog will probably exceed his Prudence post.

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    1. I'm going to have to join this drinking establishment so that I can watch the entertainment. Thanks for stopping over and sharing the story with me.

      Hopefully Rob does a post or 13 about the outfits the waitresses wear, I know it would be worth while. I recommend sneaking pics with the phone so that you can verbally describe and then maybe tease with a glance as well. Some of the casino's out here - wowzers. I keep ordering just so the ladies come back!

      Reminds me, one night I was at the IP playing poker and my favorite waitress Minerva (I don't know how it's spelled) was walking around the whole evening with half a nipple flashing. Half a nipple usually isn't much to get excited about but dammit that pretty much made my night every time she came back around.

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