Saturday, January 21, 2012

Great F'n Day

Last night was another of restless sleep.
Tossing, turning, waking up and looking at the clock and seeing that time has not advanced nearly as much as one would hope.
In there, somewhere, I drempt a little bit - just a strange dream that I was driving down the road and my car battery died.
Well, not being very car smart I'll just assume that the battery died.  The car lost power, coasted to a stop and I could not get it to turn back on.
That feels like a dead battery to me.
It's been a few years since my battery died while I was in the middle of traffic.  I also have just recently replaced the battery so there should be no reason to even worry about it dying.
And that literally was the end of my dream.  That was the whole dream actually.  I remember nothing else of it.  After that I tossed or turned and found myself face to face with 1:33 am.
Before I continue, 1:33 am was definitely not normal last night either. I recall 3 separate instances of sleeping and waking up and seeing that the clock read 1:33 am.  It is possible that I woke up 3 times over the course of that 60 second time span, but it just feels weird that I remember looking at that same exact time multiple times during a restless night.
And - we're back from our brief commercial break.
It is a little odd that I would find myself having an our of place dream about my car having an issue only to find out, on my way to work, that it had been broken into over night.
Maybe I've got some weird connection with my car - maybe my car is secretly alive and was trying to tell me so that I could come to it's rescue - go outside into the rainy and cold 1:33 in the morning air and come face to face with it's attacker.  Maybe my dream was my car blowing the rape whistle that I heard but misinterpreted for the random noise of just another dream?  It's tough to say.  What I do know is that I was (and really still am at this point) pretty damned annoyed.

I'm going to assume that they got spooked by something during their search for valuables because there is not a whole lot missing.  Now that it's nearly 10 hours later I have come up with a list of 4 items that were in my car and are no longer in my car.  I have searched it looking for things and I am only coming up with this small list.
1 - Cash that was in my console - This is obvious.  You break into a car you are taking the cash - DUH.
2 - Garage Door Opener - This was in my console as well.  I don't really see why this is missing though because I live in an apartment complex where there are no garage's.  In fact I don't think there is a single garage anywhere on the block that I live. Unless this person knows me or found a random piece of paper with the address to my house where the Garage Door is located, I'm just going to guess it'll get sold for 5 bucks and reprogrammed.
3 - A bottle of pills that was sitting under my console - Duh - Kids love pills.
4 - A pen and pencil set that was given to me on my 5th anniversary of working for the company that employ's me.  This was stolen out of my glove box and was the only thing taken out of my glove box.

This is the reason I think that they (and I like to think it is a they - a big group of low life's converging on my car just to irritate me and make my day shit) must have gotten spooked by someone taking a dog for a walk or a car driving by.  They only went through the front of my car.  They did not grab anything out of the back seat and there was some stuff worth grabbing in that area.
They did not pop my trunk and go through it because there definitely was some stuff back there they could have made a few bucks off of.  Nope - they grabbed the 4 things above and that was it.

I was damned happy to see that my John, Dr. Dirty, Valby CD's were still all in the car because Dammit those things are all beautiful and personally autographed by one of the last living legends in the whole fucking land.
My radio/MP3 player is still in tact - in fact I really wish they would have just taken that piece of shit. the MP3 portion has not worked in over 3 years and I really need an excuse to buy a new radio for the car.
I had a collectors edition of Star Wars: The Force Unleashed 2 (360 video game) still shrink wrapped and sitting in my back seat (was going to give it to someone yesterday) that was not disturbed.
And numerous books, poker chips in a great metal carrying case and a Wii-Fit that were all in my trunk remained undisturbed.

My glove box was left open with (almost) everything stuffed back into it and my bottle of Listerine that I keep in the garbage bin attached to my drivers side door (you know - for the Boulder Street Walkers after a quick $50 BJ) was on my drivers seat.
This was the only reason I even knew someone was in my car.  Had they just closed the glove box and removed the bottle from my seat I would have been none-the-wiser.

I think from now on I'm going to leave a big sign in my car with the web address of my blog so that in the future if something like this ever happens they know where to look to see the rant that they caused.
Maybe they'll register and become a follower and we can exchange a back and forth over why I think that they are a waste of sperm and eggs and their mom should have used better birth control and then can let me know how awesome my fucking pen and pencil set writes.


  1. F her now and charge it on Visa!
    Hey Lade Lad da Do....

  2. Ah, Doctor Dirty -- he's the MAN!

    Here's my little rant the day my car got broken into:

  3. No worries - I think I lost most of my annoyance just typing about it.

  4. That sucks that you got robbed. Sorry to hear it.

  5. Alternator man.. Battery would be if it did not start in the first place.

  6. I know a girl
    Her name is Lisa
    You can ...