This is another of my good break up stories and completely inspired by this post over on Rob's blog.
My first (and maybe shortest ever) story is here for all of those who would like to go back and read about what I think might be the greatest break-up line ever.
Everything was seemingly fine in my little world. I had just recently moved to the greatest place in the whole f'n world, Las Vegas Nevada and brought with me a chick that (at the time) I thought had potential to be a keeper (stupid lust tricking me) and I had planned an awesome birthday treat for said lovely.
I had gathered some really good information from someone who I actually have zero respect from at work. However I do know that he is a lying cheating scoundrel and if there was any opinion of his that I could trust it would be where to take a chick for a romantic evening. I'm fairly sure he took his wife there with a host of other ladies who filled the void when he got bored.
So, her birthday came and we went to Hugo's Cellar at the 4 Queens.
This place was everything I was told it would be and more.
Upon arriving for our reservation we were greeted by a gent who took a long stemmed rose out of a vase, cut the stem and wrapped it up for my date. If their panties aren't wet at this point the food should surely finish the job.
We were then seated and had one waiter come over who's job it was to serve us nothing but water should we so desire (he had a cart loaded with it). After that our main waiter brought over a cart full of appetizers for us to pick and choose from.
Next up was the salad cart which was mixed for us individual with the toppings of our choosing. Pretty much any normal thing in a salad that you can think of was on this card to choose from down to the assortment of dressings.
After our salad's were made we got to order our main course - she choose something that previously lived in an ocean far away from the desert that we were currently living in and I choose a steak wrapped in bacon (I was way ahead of this whole Everyone Loves Bacon phase that the world is going through currently) and some sort of lobstrocity that really only kinda sorta tasted good if dipped into the right sauce.
At this point while waiting for our food to arrive is when she decided to engage in conversation, a conversation that she had obviously been planning out in her head for a while and which I was not privy to any of the information until this very moment. The conversation started out something along the lines of "We really just haven't been working out that well since moving to Vegas" and ended somewhere along the lines of "I think we should probably just be friends, I'm moving out next week."
Needless to say I was pretty shocked, if I had seen this coming I definitely would have not bothered shelling out for such a dinner to celebrate the occasion of losing a relationship. However, in the "spirit of friendship" she did tell me that it would be perfectly ok if I was still willing to take her to see the new Pirates of the Caribbean movie after dinner. So, that was pretty damned kind of her to allow me to take her to a fancy dinner and a movie and not get to enjoy the power of the shocker (It comes up everywhere, I just can't figure it out man) or enjoy her vagina ever again.
And he lived happily ever after until his next relationship - the end.
p.s. - the chocolate covered strawberries for desert were fucking divine.